A number of years ago, Byron read a book I recommended to him. It was Remembering, by Wendell Berry. I have always liked Wendell Berry’s books, and there were things in this book that reminded me of my Dad. So Byron read it, but he didn’t like it as much as I did. However, this many years later, I found this quote copied down in his notebook:
…from Byron’s notebook
Byron at the bookstore…
My husband, Byron, was a constant reader, and for almost 54 years we shared and talked about books. Although we often read very different things, we always enjoyed talking about what we were reading and the ideas, or the beautiful writing, that impressed us. For those of you who are new to my blog, I lost Byron to cancer in September. It’s a difficult loss in so many ways, but to lose a precious reading partner is really hard. However, when I look at his shelves, at his collection of books, at his favorite book, at the last book he gave me, or at the last book he was reading…I find so many wonderful things to read now in his honor. I continue to be inspired by him and by his reading choices. My beloved reading partner lives on in my heart, and he continues to expand and enrich my reading world.
I’ve created a new category on my blog called “Byron’s Books” so that those posts are easier for me to find. To honor his memory and his love of reading, those posts will include reviews of his books as I read them, quotes he kept in his notebooks, lists he made, and other memories of his reading life over the years.
Byron’s corner … one of his bookshelves.
Japanese Literature Challenge
Meredith, at Dolce Bellezza, is once again hosting her Japanese Literature challenge. I have participated in this challenge many times and it’s always enjoyable. I have a special interest in Japan and it’s history and culture because my husband’s mother was Japanese. His grandmother was a picture bride from Japan to Hawaii in the early 1900s. It’s a fascinating family history, so over the years, we have collected a lot of books and DVDs about that culture. I lost my husband, Byron, to cancer in September, so this time my participation in this immersion into Japanese literature and culture is a part of my grieving process.
For the challenge this year, I decided to list only the books that I already own and would like to read. There are quite a few books already sitting on my shelves that fit this challenge, so I’ve put together a list of some of them to choose from. I also have quite a few DVDs of Japanese films because that was an interest my husband and I shared. So, while I will be enjoying the reading for this challenge, I’m also going to have my own Japanese Film Festival and re-visit some of those movies. That’s the plan!
Thank you, Meredith, for hosting this lovely challenge once again!
My Want-to-Read List:
My List of Japanese Films to Watch:
My husband’s grandmother and aunt…
Hello, friends. It’s past due time for an update on life and reading. Well, there’s been a lot of life going on, but not a lot of reading for me this month.
July has been an intense month for us filled with too many medical appointments. My focus, and the focus of our family, has ended up being entirely on my husband and his illness. The cancer journey truly is a roller coaster, and the last three weeks have been filled with gigantic ups and downs.
That said, we are still living each precious day to the fullest. Despite physical challenges, we still do as much as Byron’s limited energy allows. We share time with friends and family near and far (mostly on Zoom calls), and we laugh a lot, watch good shows on TV, try out new recipes or take-out food that might taste good to Byron’s chemo-damaged sense of taste, and we cherish our time with our daughter, son, and our precious grandboy.
Byron is reading more than I am right now, and what a potpourri of genres! His current read is The World as We Knew It: Dispatches from a Changing Climate, edited by Amy Brady and Tajja Isen. He recently finished the first volume of one of the graphic novels on my shelf called A Man and His Cat, by Umi Sakurai. Before that, he read The Cat Who Saved Books, by Sosuke Natsukawa. And before that, it was a book he liked so much he bought copies for our kids — Other Minds: The Octopus, The Sea, and The Deep Origins of Consciousness, by Peter Godfrey-Smith.
Early mornings finds me in the garden watering and weeding. I can’t keep up with either, it seems, but it’s nice to be out there. And I have also been working on my project of scanning old slides and photos from the last 53 years!
We are busy with life right now amid the ordered chaos of medical treatments and tests. And we are deeply grateful to our medical team, and to our extended family and friends team, and to our own little family unit team. All of whom bolster us up and help to give us the courage we need to face whatever life brings each day.
A Glimpse of our July in photos: (there are captions to the photos)
I was happily reminded this month of the very enjoyable January/February reading challenge hosted by Carl V. Anderson (@Stainless Steel Droppings) years ago. His “Sci-Fi Experience” was always a highlight of my winter, and expanded my reading horizons exponentially. It was something that recently happened to my husband, Byron, that reminded me of that fun, immersive experience.
A couple of months ago, when Byron was sleepless due to some side effects of his cancer treatments, he would read articles and listen to podcasts about his cancer. It was fine that he was learning as much as he could about it, but I worried that such reading in the middle of the night would add to his insomnia and would raise his anxiety levels.
As an early Christmas present, our daughter sent him an audiobook, the first in a science fiction series she liked called The Expanse. Byron was not much of a science fiction reader, but we had watched the TV series and liked it. Our daughter told him the books were even better, so he started listening to that instead of those podcasts. The first book was called Leviathan Wakes, by James S. A. Corey (actually two men who collaborate on writing this series), and he became completely hooked on the series! He’s just about to finish the sixth book, the seventh book is ready to download, and he is loving his winter “Sci Fi Experience!”
“Quality of Life” is a phrase we are using often in our home right now. Reading and special book-related experiences like this one greatly enhance our quality of life and are so deeply appreciated during a difficult time.
.
My husband has long admired Joseph Conrad’s writing. Conrad’s stories are both powerful and profound, and his writing is impressively beautiful, especially considering that English was not his first language. Byron’s old, yellowed copy of Heart of Darkness sits on our coffee table these days rather than on the bookshelf.
So I wasn’t surprised the other day when Byron asked me to read a quote from Conrad’s, Lord Jim. He had just run across the quote in his handwritten reading notebook, copied down from his reading of the book in 2018, and told me that the quote described what having terminal cancer is like for him. He said that Conrad nailed it. It is heart-wrenching to read, but I’m glad that he shared these really deep emotions with me, through the words of one of his favorite authors.
I decided to share this quote with you, because I think it perfectly demonstrates a big part of why we read — to find those nuggets of truth that explain, give an understanding of, or put into words what we are going through in life at the moment.
Joseph Conrad, Lord Jim, Chapter 2
There are many shades in the danger of adventures and gales, and it is only now and then that there appears on the face of facts a sinister violence of intention—that indefinable something which forces it upon the mind and the heart of a man, that this complication of accidents or these elemental furies are coming at him with a purpose of malice, with a strength beyond control, with an unbridled cruelty that means to tear out of him his hope and his fear, the pain of his fatigue and his longing for rest: which means to smash, to destroy, to annihilate all he has seen, known, loved, enjoyed, or hated; all that is priceless and necessary—the sunshine, the memories, the future,—which means to sweep the whole precious world utterly away from his sight by the simple and appalling act of taking his life.
Forty-nine years ago today, I married my best friend. He and I were, and still are, kindred spirits. Both of us felt that kinship when we first met, but we also had proof sitting on our respective book shelves. Each of us owned a very old book from the same set of books….one on his shelf and a matching volume on mine. His was Pride and Prejudice (Reader, need I say more?), and mine was Silas Marner. For that reason, and of course many others, we decided WE were meant to be.
My husband is reading Joseph Conrad’s, Lord Jim, and he shared with me this enlightened sentence from the book knowing how much I hate reading introductions, and knowing that I refuse to read introductions BEFORE I read a story. They always ruin the story for me!
A Fondness For Reading 